Down but not Out

One downside to my mommying job, I don't have sick leave. I get sick, I take care of myself and still have to take care of the little ones. The daddy tries his best to lighten my load but he has to go to work so I have no choice but to "report to work" myself and just pray really hard that my kids don't catch what I have. No success with Roo, he caught it the second day. Annie is still holding strong-- now I see once more why I have to stick it out with breastfeeding no matter how exhausting it is--apparently, she's getting a good dose of antibodies from the breastmilk, enough to fight against this nasty bug.

The other day, the daddy came home sick. We had to put him in isolation in the other room--had to take precautions just in case he caught a different bug from work. Made it all the more difficult for me--I had to take the whole night duty with the baby all by myself. Two nights in a row now, very little sleep. Can't catch up on sleep during the day too because there's a flurry of activity around the house with our sick-but-still-active boy. Just have to forget that I'm sick--it's a wonder how the mind can control the body. Think that you cannot be sick and your body copes and you manage to take care of your precious ones like you're not. Just have to ignore the pains and aches--no choice but to be strong for the ones I love.

I'm a mommy, I can do this. God help me!

Small Talk

Now what do I write about? Do I start with small talk and say something about the weather? Like, (clearing my throat, ahem!) "And now for the weather report..."

Bangkok is currently enjoying rainy days (mostly nights, actually). Yup, we are so glad the rains have graced us with its refreshing presence. The extended summer season had brought so much heat and humidity that these daily downpours are a welcome respite to all of us. Loud claps of thunder occasionally interrupt what little sleep we get in between feedings at night but I don't mind them a bit. I'm so sleep-deprived that I just go right back to slumberland, my sleep so sweet that I'm oblivious to the loud pitter-patter on the window even if it is right by my side of the bed (MY man was telling me that the other night it sounded like we were under a waterfall but I still didn't hear that!). Then when morning breaks, I find it a joy to wake up to raindrops on our windows, and sights of green and lush trees all around us.

So with the rainy season in full swing, MY man cannot take the river taxi to go to work like he used to. He's been driving to work everyday and that means his commute is longer. Rainy days in Bangkok is synonymous to really bad traffic (meaning, cars don't move at all for like thirty or so minutes at a time). The daddy is rarely home by five pm as was his old schedule. Some days our baby is already in bed settled for the night when her daddy arrives.

And that's the weather report : Rainy (but still hot and humid when it's not raining) with widespread thunderstorms. This is Mommy IA reporting from the Land of Smiles. Good day to y'all!

Back for Good? We'll See...

Hellos! It's been ages! I'm hoping to make a comeback to blogging. I've been itching to write, so many stories to share, just no time to put everything down in words. Crossing my fingers I'd have enough quiet time to at least give an update.

So, I am a new mommy! To the most adorable baby girl in the world! We call her Annie--her big brother, a.k.a. Kuya Roo insisted that Annie is her nickname--so we willingly oblige. She is my princess, just the darling baby girl that I've always dreamed of! God is so good! I am so blessed! Nothing more I can ask for. I am a content, happy mom of two.

That said, I'll see you around. Stories about my precious ones and my own bumpy but happy adventures in mommying coming right up!

Miracles Do Happen

What do you say to a child whose pet is clearly breathing its last few breaths? How do I explain it to my son that no, his fish has not learned to swim upside down, but that it is upside down because it is dying? His voice was full of pride and excitement when he told me that his Dorothy has finally learned to swim upside down like the janitor fish! With my heart jammed in my throat at his news, I rushed to the aquarium and saw his fish floating with its belly up, gasping for breath.

A quick call to MY man had me running to the kitchen. Since I am not able to change the water in the aquarium in my pregnant condition, he suggested that I fish Dorothy out of the aquarium and put him (yes, this Dorothy is a boy ;D) in a bowl. The daddy has been very busy lately and has not made time to change the water in the aquarium, and that could be the reason why Dorothy was dying again (yes, this happened before). I hurriedly scooped Dorothy into a bowl, then transferred him into a tiny aquarium. From the way the fish gasped for breath, it was time to say goodbye. He was mostly floating motionless on his back, and he hardly minded our prodding to get back to his business of swimming. Still, I encouraged Roo to get down on his knees and pray. I told him only a miracle from God can save Dorothy. We prayed together and his initial tearful prayer was this: Dear God, we are sad that Dorothy is dying. Please give us strength to take care of him. Amen.

In my mind, I was praying that God help my boy to accept the reality of death. This would be the second fish that he loved that he would be saying goodbye to, and he is so attached to anything/anyone he loves. I heard him praying again by himself a while later, and while we took turns encouraging the fish to keep swimming, I kept talking to him to make sure he understands that Dorothy might not make it. Just before he took his afternoon nap, he urged me to pray with him again.

My boy didn't make a fuss about napping--he usually does. He dozed right off to dreamland without a trace of worry in his face. His problem is in the hands of God and he trusts that the Creator is faithful in answering prayers. Me, the mommy couldn't even sleep. Never mind that I'm missing my needed rest, never mind that today I'm very tired from walking all morning at the baby fair. I had to check on Dorothy. So as soon as my son started snoring, I slipped out of our room. As I walked into the kitchen, my heart sank-- the fish that was hardly moving, hardly breathing and was floating upside down just before we went into the room, was not moving at all! But as I looked closely into the tank, I noticed that it was on its right-side up! And as I tapped the side of the tank, the Dorothy suddenly snapped into motion, swimming around like it had just awakened from deep sleep! A miracle! Praise the Lord!

The earnest prayer of my little boy was answered once again. I really have a lot to learn about faith from this little child that I am so blessed with.

Girl, Boy, Whatever.

Inspite of the practical side of me and the fact that I just love the way my boy adores me, I've been finding myself praying fervently that God answer my boys' prayers. They really want the baby to be a girl, and for their sakes, I've been wanting the baby to be a girl too. Maybe it won't be so bad to have a princess in our family--would sure teach my Roo to be more gentle. I know I would enjoy shopping for a girl--there are just so many cute and adorable outfits everywhere just waiting to be picked off the shelf. And it would perhaps be a welcome change to have a baby who wouldn't be all over the place all the time she's awake, just like the older brother, that is, if she won't be anything like my Roo. I envision my princess, quietly reading in her corner, or playing with her dolls without turning our place upside down. Such bliss that would be!

But after the visit with the sonographer, alas my hopes have been taking a nosedive, and I'm trying ever so hard to believe that things could still turn around. While it is still too early to tell definitely the gender of the baby, we saw 'something' several times that could mean we're getting Roo a brother. The doctor didn't want to confirm it but like MY man says, it's more like 80% positive that we're having another boy. I didn't know how to break the news to my little man, and when I did it, he was busy romping around with his lolo. When the news finally sank in and we were getting ready for bed that night, he had tears in his eyes, and he was fighting not to cry over the disappointing news. Despite that though, he's been telling people ever since that he might be getting a brother. But when he's alone with me, he talks about how sad he is that he cannot have a sister. My heart goes out to him, and I wish I have the power to give him what he wants. We keep telling him God knows what's best for him, and that we should be happy no matter what the baby is, we'll love him/her for who/what he/she is. And while there's still a chance that we might be wrong, the big brother is slowly starting to accept it, and talks about the games he will play with his brother. Whenever we discuss names, and we'd suggest a girl's name, he'd remind us that we should be thinking of boys' names instead because the baby is a brother. My little Roo sure is showing maturity that I'm so proud of--I don't have any doubts that he is going to be a wonderful big brother!

Happy 2010

A blessed and happy new year everyone!

We're safely back in the land of smiles--the trip was too short; too many family and friends we were not able to meet, still too many dishes we haven't tried (mainly because MY man specialized in eating bangus for almost every meal), and too much shopping money leftover (read: holiday crowd gave me the dizzies every time I attempted to do some shopping)--but we had a great and relaxing time in the homeland. It was just heavenly to be back in a place where help abounds, so we woke up to the inviting smells of breakfast every morning, we didn't have to worry a thing about cleaning up, nor doing any laundry. For the four days we were there, we were spoiled to the max, thanks to Sara and N. Flor!

'Twas refreshing too to have spent some time with my mom's sisters, and cousins who didn't go home to Roxas--felt good to have laughed like the old times, and catch up on each other's news. Roo had such great fun romping around and playing with his cousins, he didn't want to leave! He played and played with the boys, riding trikes, building blocks, blowing bubbles, painting pictures, building forts, kicking and shooting balls, the whole afternoon we spent at their place till he was dead batt. His daddy had to eat dinner with one hand, and hold him with the other hand as he snored and recharged all through dinner.

Can hardly wait till we get to go back--next time around, we hope to stay longer so we can get to meet everybody.

Hope you all are starting the new year with smiles! Have a blessed and wonderful 2010!

Selling or Begging?

I first noticed the boy as I was walking towards the taxi queue. He was a chubby one, between ten to twelve years old, dressed in an over-sized dirty tee shirt and short pants. In his hand was a bunch of stringed sampaguita flowers which he was trying to sell to a lady waiting in line. For a minute or two after that, my attention riveted to how long the queue was, and how long it would take for us to get a cab to go home. Exhausted from walking in the mall for about two hours, this pregnant mommy was all but ready for a nice, warm shower.

The next time I saw him, he was about two feet behind me. This time, he was sitting down on the curb, still holding on to his flowers. Then and there, he got my full attention. His tears were flowing down his cheeks and he was wiping them furiously with his free hand. I glanced at MY man who was in the queue with Roo--they were about five feet away from me and he mouthed something which I couldn't really decipher. When they finally reached the point where I was standing, MY man explained to me that he overheard the boy telling the woman that he'd get beaten if he doesn't sell off the flowers. Whether that was true, or just an act which is really hard to tell, we don't know until now. What I know is, parental instinct hit me, and I wondered why his parents would do that to him--started imagining my Roo in the same situation and my eyes watered. MY man reached into his pocket, got fifty pesos out, and handed it to the boy. Still sobbing, he accepted the money, then counted five strings, with about five scrawny-looking flowers in each string, and gave them to us. That was the last we saw of him as we finally reached the end of the line and took a taxi home.

There's a big chance that the boy was part of a scam, that the crying was all an act to sell the flowers and make money. Or to give the boy the benefit of the doubt, his lazy parents, or whoever was in charge of him, was just using him to get money from people. Not exactly begging, but it could still pass as another form of begging.

Oh that children be spared from this heartless practice!