Girl, Boy, Whatever.

Inspite of the practical side of me and the fact that I just love the way my boy adores me, I've been finding myself praying fervently that God answer my boys' prayers. They really want the baby to be a girl, and for their sakes, I've been wanting the baby to be a girl too. Maybe it won't be so bad to have a princess in our family--would sure teach my Roo to be more gentle. I know I would enjoy shopping for a girl--there are just so many cute and adorable outfits everywhere just waiting to be picked off the shelf. And it would perhaps be a welcome change to have a baby who wouldn't be all over the place all the time she's awake, just like the older brother, that is, if she won't be anything like my Roo. I envision my princess, quietly reading in her corner, or playing with her dolls without turning our place upside down. Such bliss that would be!

But after the visit with the sonographer, alas my hopes have been taking a nosedive, and I'm trying ever so hard to believe that things could still turn around. While it is still too early to tell definitely the gender of the baby, we saw 'something' several times that could mean we're getting Roo a brother. The doctor didn't want to confirm it but like MY man says, it's more like 80% positive that we're having another boy. I didn't know how to break the news to my little man, and when I did it, he was busy romping around with his lolo. When the news finally sank in and we were getting ready for bed that night, he had tears in his eyes, and he was fighting not to cry over the disappointing news. Despite that though, he's been telling people ever since that he might be getting a brother. But when he's alone with me, he talks about how sad he is that he cannot have a sister. My heart goes out to him, and I wish I have the power to give him what he wants. We keep telling him God knows what's best for him, and that we should be happy no matter what the baby is, we'll love him/her for who/what he/she is. And while there's still a chance that we might be wrong, the big brother is slowly starting to accept it, and talks about the games he will play with his brother. Whenever we discuss names, and we'd suggest a girl's name, he'd remind us that we should be thinking of boys' names instead because the baby is a brother. My little Roo sure is showing maturity that I'm so proud of--I don't have any doubts that he is going to be a wonderful big brother!